Abby Barnes, M.S., CCC-SLP
As a parent, you know your child better than anyone. With all the information that’s available about autism spectrum disorder, you may be wondering how to spot the signs of autism in a 3-year-old.
Autism is a developmental condition that affects how children communicate, interact, and process the world around them. While signs of autism can sometimes appear earlier, they often become more noticeable between ages 2 and 3.
Speech therapy is one of the most common therapies recommended for children with autism. Expressable speech therapists work with autistic people of all ages and their families. In this article, we discuss the common signs of autism in a 3-year-old, what to look for, and how speech therapy can help.
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Get startedWhat is autism spectrum disorder?
Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a neurodevelopmental condition that impacts social skills, communication, and behavior. It’s called a “spectrum” because symptoms and their severity can vary widely from one child to another.
Some children may have subtle or mild signs of autism. Others may need more support to function in their daily lives. No two autistic children are exactly alike—but recognizing the early signs of autism is key to finding any support that’s needed.
Communication signs of autism in a 3-year-old
At 3 years old, most children can use short phrases, ask simple questions, and follow basic directions. If your child is not meeting these milestones, it could be a sign of a speech or language delay, or possibly autism.
Keep in mind that just because a child has a speech or language delay does not mean they are autistic. The symptoms often overlap, but there are some distinguishing behaviors with autism that we’ll cover in a bit. First, let’s look at some of the ways autism might affect how a toddler communicates.
Here are some communication-related signs of autism to watch for in a 3-year-old:
Not talking as much as other children their age: Your child may speak very little or not at all. You might feel like they always need to “catch up” to what you think they should be doing for their age. By age 3, children are typically talking in short sentences and expressing their needs with ease.
Using repetitive language, called echolalia: They might repeat words or phrases instead of using them meaningfully in conversation.
Lack of back-and-forth conversation: Autistic children may not respond when spoken to, or they may have trouble taking turns while interacting with someone.
Not using gestures to communicate: Waving, pointing, or nodding may be limited or missing altogether.
Difficulty following directions: Your child may not seem to understand or respond to verbal instructions like “Go hang up your coat” or “Hand me the towel, please.”
Is your child on track?
Take our free screener to learn more about your child's development and whether a speech evaluation is recommended.
Screener for childrenSocial signs of autism in a 3-year-old
By age 3, many children are starting to show social curiosity. They’re beginning to interact with friends, play pretend, and learn how to interact with others at school or daycare. A child with autism may struggle with some of these skills.
Here are some common social signs of autism at age 3:
Limited eye contact: Autistic kids may avoid looking at people when they talk or play.
Appear to have a lack of interest in other kids: They may not seek out or respond to other children during play activities.
Limited pretend play: Play development may be delayed in autistic kids. They might not act out simple play routines like feeding a doll or pretending to cook toy food.
Challenges with understanding emotions: Your child may not seem to react to others’ feelings, or they may seem unaware of social cues in general.
Behavioral signs of autism in a 3-year-old
Many children with autism have patterns of behavior that are unique or repetitive. Behaviors that may point to autism include:
Repetitive movements: These might include hand-flapping, rocking, or spinning.
Strict routines: Your child may become very upset by changes in their schedule or their environment.
Discomfort to sensory input: They may be sensitive to loud noises, bright lights, or certain textures—or may not respond to them at all.
Strong, focused interests: They might fixate on one topic or toy and play with it in the same way over and over.
Unconventional play: Instead of playing with toys as intended, your child might line them up or focus on specific parts like wheels or tags.
What to do if you think your child is autistic
It’s natural to be keeping track of your child’s development. Every child is different. However, if your 3-year-old is showing some of the signs of autism mentioned above, it’s a good idea to start talking with a professional.
If you’re concerned about your 3-year-old’s development, here are some steps to take:
1 Talk to your pediatrician
Tell them what you’re seeing at home, and ask about developmental screenings. Your pediatrician can help determine if your child needs further testing for autism.
2 Ask for an autism evaluation
To test for autism in a 3-year-old, ask your pediatrician how your child can be evaluated. There are several steps involved in an autism diagnosis. Different experts can diagnose autism, including psychologists, pediatricians, and neurologists. Psychologists are a big part of the diagnostic process. According to the American Psychological Association (APA), a psychologist will likely use the following information to help with an autism diagnosis:
Talking with the child
Observing the child’s behavior
Tests of cognitive and language abilities
Medical tests to rule out other conditions
Interviews with parents, teachers, or other adults who can answer questions about the child’s social, emotional, and behavioral development
3 Start early intervention
If autism is diagnosed, therapies such as speech therapy can help your child grow their communication and social skills. The earlier a child starts getting support, the sooner they can make progress.
How does speech therapy help autistic children?
Speech therapy for autism focuses on helping children communicate as clearly as possible at the current time. It also lays the foundation for developing more complex communication abilities down the road.
The way your child is currently communicating will inform their initial goals in speech therapy. Some kids may work on using words, or expanding into phrases or sentences. Others may be nonverbal and can learn other ways to communicate, such as by using gestures or augmentative-alternative communication (AAC).
It’s important to find a speech therapist who will support you as the parent or caregiver. With online speech therapy at Expressable, your child will learn from their speech therapist during their sessions. But you’ll also be coached on how to support your child—because kids learn best from the people they spend the most time with and love the most (that’s you!). You’ll also have access to our online learning portal, full of videos, tips, and activities to make at-home speech therapy practice even easier. The more you practice during your everyday routines, the faster your child will make progress.
You can learn more about how Expressable speech therapy works for autistic children in our autism treatment guide.
Find the right speech therapist for your child
If your child is having a hard time communicating, we’re here to help. We’ll match you with a licensed speech therapist who can perform an evaluation and help you determine the best next steps. Find the right speech therapist for your child here!
FAQs about autism in 3-year-olds
1 What are the early signs of autism in a 3-year-old?
Early signs of autism in toddlers can include speech delay, repeating the same phrases or behaviors, avoiding eye contact, and lack of interest in pretend play or playing with other kids. If you notice these signs, try our free online screener to check your child's communication development.
2 Does a speech delay mean my child has autism?
A speech delay can be a sign of autism, but it doesn't always mean your child is autistic. Speech delays can have a variety of causes. If you're worried about your child's speech, get matched with a speech therapist who can help you understand what's going on and what to do next.
3 Can autism be diagnosed in a 3-year-old?
Yes, autism can be diagnosed at age 3. To diagnose autism, doctors look at a child's development, how they communicate, and how they behave. Specialists such as psychologists, pediatricians, and neurologists can make the diagnosis. If you think your child might be autistic, talk with your pediatrician about testing.
4 How can speech therapy benefit a 3-year-old with autism?
Speech therapy helps autistic children learn to communicate better, express their needs, and interact with others. A speech therapist will create a care plan targeted to your child’s needs, including support and guidance for their family. To learn more about how speech therapy can help autistic kids, take a look at this article.
An important note: We believe that when speaking about any community as a whole, the best approach is to prioritize that community’s voices, needs, and preferences. Within the larger autism community, the current language preference is identity-first (e.g., "autistic child," rather than "child with autism"), which is why we use that language in our content. Expressable is committed to listening to and learning from the populations we serve. If and when their preferences change, we’ll adjust our approach accordingly.
How Expressable Can Help
Concerned your child isn't reaching age-expected milestones? Looking for communication support from a professional? Expressable is a national online speech therapy practice serving children and adults. We treat all major areas of communication and feeding, offer flexible hours including evenings and weekends, and accept most major health insurance plans. We’re proud to have earned more than 3,000 5-star reviews from our clients (4.9/5 average).
Our therapy model is centered on parent and caregiver involvement. Research proves that empowering caregivers to participate in their loved one’s therapy leads to better outcomes. That’s why we combine live, 1-on-1 speech therapy with personalized education and home practice activities for faster progress.
Communication is more than words. It’s how we share how we feel and show who we are. We’re here to help you or your child do just that.
